ANOTHER Trip to the Doctor
I swear. If I ever get back to just cruising along, nice and normal, without having to go to the doctor for something every week, I will be one happy woman. Don't get me wrong - I am thrilled to be cancer free... but damned if I am not completely and totally frustrated by all of the lingering nonsense that stupid tumor and its treatments left behind.
I AM happy to report, at least, that with very little need to dip into the butt ointment, my rear end is doing MUCH better. All it took was no more baby wipes and no more soap. And I am left with a much happier... everything back there. So a big thanks to Dr. Williams. Hooray!
Yesterday, however, I noticed that the symptoms I was having last week that I thought felt like a urinary tract infection seemed to be back - and with a vengeance. Pain. Nausea. Urgency - generally with no results. I felt horrid most of the day and this morning I decided it was time to deal with it and called up my PCP, Dr. Raj - whom I love. They squeaked me in mid-day, and while the quickie test they do there showed no infection, she said she'd rather treat me for it and send it to the lab for a culture, just to be sure (and hopefully help the symptoms if it IS a UTI). Also rockin' the AZO and cranberry, which make for some magically red/orange pee.
It's just so frustrating. I am CURED! I want to feel better! Not terrible. I want to NOT go to the doctor. I want to not WORRY about every little thing. I want to enjoy new online cancer friends instead of being terrified by their posts about re-occurrences and dead friends. I just want to be normal again...
And I know I can't be. Never will be. Not the normal I remember, anyhow. And, I mean, overall that's ok (kinda has to be, doesn't it?). It's just harder some days and with certain things than it is on/with others. Lately, I've had an amazing number of good days. So I shouldn't complain about one bad one. Not that loudly, anyhow...
Xxo, Phoebe
I AM happy to report, at least, that with very little need to dip into the butt ointment, my rear end is doing MUCH better. All it took was no more baby wipes and no more soap. And I am left with a much happier... everything back there. So a big thanks to Dr. Williams. Hooray!
Yesterday, however, I noticed that the symptoms I was having last week that I thought felt like a urinary tract infection seemed to be back - and with a vengeance. Pain. Nausea. Urgency - generally with no results. I felt horrid most of the day and this morning I decided it was time to deal with it and called up my PCP, Dr. Raj - whom I love. They squeaked me in mid-day, and while the quickie test they do there showed no infection, she said she'd rather treat me for it and send it to the lab for a culture, just to be sure (and hopefully help the symptoms if it IS a UTI). Also rockin' the AZO and cranberry, which make for some magically red/orange pee.
It's just so frustrating. I am CURED! I want to feel better! Not terrible. I want to NOT go to the doctor. I want to not WORRY about every little thing. I want to enjoy new online cancer friends instead of being terrified by their posts about re-occurrences and dead friends. I just want to be normal again...
And I know I can't be. Never will be. Not the normal I remember, anyhow. And, I mean, overall that's ok (kinda has to be, doesn't it?). It's just harder some days and with certain things than it is on/with others. Lately, I've had an amazing number of good days. So I shouldn't complain about one bad one. Not that loudly, anyhow...
Xxo, Phoebe
Comments
You can be positive tomorrow.