Thanksgiving 2012

By phoebe marie -
I spent last Thanksgiving trying not to puke my chemotherapied guts out down at Ryan's family's house in Mansfield.  I took my very first anti-nausea pill and my very first anxiety pill.  I nibbled crackers and drank ginger ale or sprite or something and hoped I wasn't ruining anyone's holiday.  I worried about how bad Ryan felt that he had decided to drive us down there in his '71 Challenger - not the smoothest, cleanest smelling ride on the planet - and that I had ended up getting sick because of it.

And I had cancer.

This Thanksgiving I am at home.  I am in remission.  I feel healthier and happier than I can ever remember being.  I am closer to my husband, my family and my friends.  I am filled with wonder and gratitude every single day of my life, now.

This Thanksgiving, I am grateful for cancer.  I hate it, but I am thankful for all of the things it brought me.  All of the positive things it gave me.  All of the important lessons it taught me.

This Thanksgiving, Ryan and I have TWO turkeys cooking - mine full of my sausagey bacony stuffing in the oven, and Ryan's hand-brined bird out in the smoker.  Including ourselves, a dozen people will be eating here this afternoon.

And I am so very very grateful for them all.  And so excited.

I wish I could make this deeper and more meaningful sounding, but I gotta get back to basting and shit.

Thank you so much to all of my beautiful friends, family, and strangers alike who have been with me through this.  I am grateful for you all and for what this blog has allowed me to do over this past year-plus.

All my love to each of you,
Phoebe

Comments

M said…
But, what about the Thanksgiving at your house last year that I was at? I thought it was really nice to be with you and your family, even though you were super tired. The Mansfield thanksgiving was a bust, but I was happy to spend time with my friend that I am very thankful for. So glad you are healthy and happy this year! xo
November 26, 2012 at 12:14 PM
Mum said…
Mallorie, that WAS a wonderful celebration! Even with all of the health issues going on, to still be with family and friends was such a gift. Phoebe's Mum
November 27, 2012 at 8:38 AM
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